I have been a writing machine lately, but a pretty shitty blogger. I jot down thoughts while I snuggle up next to my boys in bed, but that quiet time at the computer has been reserved for updating family and friends, job hunting, and news reading.
I feel like I am finally emerging from a loooong tunnel and slowly my eyes are adjusting to the bright light of the real world.
Though I have missed this world, and I can't believe I can finally feel the warmth of daylight on my cheeks again, I have quickly noticed that nothing looks the same. I have accepted that it never will.
I see people differently. I see health, friendships, love, milestones all with a new genuine appreciation. Not when I take a moment to reflect, but every second of every single day. When people notice a sweet chubby baby in the grocery store, I want to spill every detail about what a fighter he is and all he has been through, just in case they didn't know just HOW sweet this chubby baby is and how special he is to me.
Life is picking back up. I no longer feel like we are sitting around "waiting" for things to happen. It's like this magic clock that stops when we need it to, and resumes when we're ready, even when we don't know what ready is.
Max rocked his surgery...almost 2 months ago. Yeah, it's been that long since I *really* blogged. (To catch up on inpatient photos and such, you can "like" his FB page, Mighty Max and the Mission Squad.) He is not taking any medications (for the first time ever) and doesn't see his Cardiologist again until December. He's just a regular ol' baby with a good background story.
Oh yeah...Max has a page now. Mighty Max and the Mission Squad.
Eldon just picked out new clothes and supplies for Kindergarten. Sweet nostalgia, I must stop here. I can only pretend to chop onions so many times a day.
The boys' Dad landed a pretty sweet job....here. He lives here now and they get to see him every single day. Big stuff.
I am loving this new life. Trying my best to pay it forward after all the help we have received, reconnecting with the friends who have supported me in every way, building new friendships from a foundation of common understanding, and trying on the title of "advocate," not just for Max, but for congenital heart defects in general.
Oh, and I'm mom. Best role I play, though I am hoping to drop the "stay at home" part soon. (more on that to come.)
Nice to see you again, real world. It's been a trip.